Wednesday, March 7, 2007
Bullies and Friends
Life is full of twists and turns isn't it? For instance my son is a terrific person, with great qualities and talents in several areas. This year for some reason his friends have decided that they will tease and pick on him. It is so unbearable to have to watch a 14 year old go through this. They act like for lack of better words "a bunch of girls". They think they are really cool and everyone around them should be judged to their standards. They have created a set of code words so they can tease, make fun of, or talk about people right in front of them. It is very hateful and feels like bullying or gang stuff to me. Well recently I have found out that my son, their supposed friend is the brundt of their code jokes! When a good friend and mother of one of these other boys told me about the codes she said it was directed mainly at this other boy. And she was laughing about it. My feelings were so hurt and I was so dumbfounded that I didn't say anything to stick up for the guys being picked on. This is a bunch of 8th grade boys, and I think it is the stuff that causes the kids being bullied to retaliate. My tender mercy that goes with this is rather odd, but it is this. Two good friends of Tanners, true friends, recently told me about him and how much they like him. I can't buy him friends, or get them for him. This challenge will certainly make him stronger. But will his whole personality be changed or altered? I know that as I pray for him everyday, I get a little more enlightenment and feel blessed to be close to him and help him recognize the tender mercies in his life. Any advice from parents who have dealt with similar situations please post.
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2 comments:
I think kids are sure different these days. It does sound like something a group of girls would do. I hope that everything will be ok and this phase of theirs will pass quickly. I'm glad Tanner has two good friends that are sticking by him.
Why is junior high so hard?? It seems like now that Clinton has got into High School, things have settled down. But those middle years were a real bummer!
I hope you will all be ok! ((hugs))
I always tell my kids that bullying is a sign of weakness. Only weak people make other people feel badly about who they are. Teach Tanner to have compassion for weak people because that's what they need. Tanner is strong and valiant and capable (and cute!) He needs friends that see that in him.
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